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Wednesday, July 23, 2014

My husband has aspergers and that's okay.

Each day is a challenge for us as a family. Parents can't agree and sometimes a child doesn't get what she wants. (We have one very young boy who usually gets what he wants).

But doesn't that sound like anyone's home?

It does.

Living with a husband who has Aspergers isn't always a simple thing. Sometimes I don't say things exactly or clearly enough. Sometimes I misunderstand what he's saying. A lot of times our parenting style is different and a bit confusing to myself.

What is challenging for our family is a piece of cake for yours. Communication has always been an issue for us. However, we have learned that despite miscommunication it is always best to move forward with the best plan.

For example, today I made a mistake. I told husband that we needed to get groceries. I thought I had explained that we needed a big grocery trip. He didn't hear me. So midway through our trip I got the, "Are we done yet" question. Of course, we weren't even close and that was a problem. I compromised. I sped through and left a few items so we could get home.

My life is about compromise. I go through my marriage compromising and sometimes completely giving up my wants. But that's not so usual is it?

For parents out there who wonder if your asperger child will ever have a spouse or children. I am here to tell you that they can. It has never been easy for me. It's something I struggle through almost daily, but I haven't regretted the lives I've created and loved.

My life is full. The different perspective that my husband is able to bring to this family has been lifesaving. The times his aspergers is helpful make up for the times it's debilitating.

My hope in writing my thoughts is that others can understand that they can lead a normal and happy life. It takes patience and practice, but mostly, it takes a lot of love. My husband is my hero. He lifts me up when I'm down and helps me feel like a fabulous queen. I hope that other's who have aspergers can find the happiness that we have found together.

Monday, June 30, 2014

Welcome Aryeh Stephen Thomas Holt!

We'll start back to Monday 06/23/2014. I was miserable and trying my hardest to get through each day. For over three weeks I had been dealing with on and off contractions that would occasionally regulate then go away when I rested or drank a bunch of water. I was uncomfortable and I always knew Ari was going to come early. Part of me thought he was close to 8lbs or at least would be by the time I had him. I was scheduled for an induction on 06/30/2014. I went to my regular Monday visit where my doctor told me that I was 3cm 80% thinned and baby was very low. Knowing my previous labors which have always been quick (2 hours and 6 hours respectively) I opted to stay home that day and see how things went. As the day went on I felt worse, but things never regulated and I went to bed exhausted. Tuesday I woke feeling pretty great and felt some cramping, but nothing really different. Went to work and put in a good seven and a half hours before I felt terrible again. Cramping and contractions that couldn't regulate. Came home and relaxed.

On 06/25/2014 I woke feeling great. Had a great night sleep and the night before had even got some cleaning done in the kitchen. Not a whole lot, but enough where I felt good about it. Went to work. Around 10am I started to feel a little weird "Out of body" feeling. I wasn't feeling contractions or anything yet, but I had a feeling they were coming. I drove home and decided to give a good ride on the exercise bike a try. Did that for about 15 minutes and felt pretty good. Decided to head on home where we all went to our pharmacy picked up our medications and decided to run to Target. We were trying to find a good summer hat for Ari that would fit him right away. We never found one in the right size. He may end up wearing the pink one that we have. Poor little man. After that we came home where we had lunch, Tuna for me and two big glasses of water. Ten minutes after we ate my contractions started. I had downloaded a timer onto my phone that allowed me to time the contractions. They were about 5-7 minutes apart at that moment and lasting about 1 minute. They weren't hurting, but were causing a lot of discomfort. Decided to drink more water and take a walk to see if they went away. They didn't. After about an hour of that we called up Jaron's sister and her husband to watch our girls. I wasn't sure if this was labor or not as I had never actually started on my own. With Abigal I had cervadil which put me into a quick labor that dialated me to complete in about 10 minutes. Her labor was extremely painful and very quick. Brooklyn I was induced and had an epidural right off. Her labor was 6 hours and was painless. I honestly had no idea what real contractions would be like. So we went to Orem community to find out. I didn't tell a lot of people at this moment only my Mom, Jaron's sister, brother-in-law and one friend of mine knew.

After getting to Orem Community Hospital we were admitted into the observation room where they determine if you are in labor or not. If you are they will move you to a labor and delivery room. The nurse had me sit on the bed monitoring baby for about an hour. She then came back to check and said that I had progressed from a 3cm to a 3.5cm and had gotten softer. According to her that wasn't progress enough. She seemed to be encouraging us to head home. As I was saying I would rather be home she seemed to change her mind. She was a frustrating nurse. Kept telling us that the doctor wouldn't admit us because I wasn't progressing at least 1cm in an hour. I was feeling contractions at this point. They were still 5-7 minutes apart, but lasting 2 minutes. We waited another hour and when checked again I had gone from 3.5cm to 4cm. Still the nurse wouldn't admit us. I asked to walk around and she told me that I couldn't because baby needed to be monitored which I knew that they didn't really need to watch him if I wasn't being admitted yet. Once again she told us that the doctor wouldn't allow us to walk around. She would also not allow me to go home.

A half an hour passed and 6pm came. This is where the nurses switch shifts and we were blessed with one named Ana (Like Frozen). She told me to get up and go on a walk around labor and delivery. So here Jaron and I went. Walking around, me bawling my eyes out while sucking on my ice chips. We checked out the cute little babies that were in the NICU and reminisced about Abby's NICU stay. Orem Community Hospital has a newer NICU than from when Abby was there. Where there is a wall there used to be just a curtain. It looks super nice now. Anyway, Jaron and I took a few walks around Labor and Delivery all the while nurses were looking at me with sympathy. Probably thinking I was an all natural mom. I didn't want to be, but first nurse wouldn't give me anything for pain as I hadn't been admitted yet. They did offer morphine, but I knew that could harm baby's lungs so I dealt with the pain. I have a higher pain tolerance so Jaron knows that when I'm bawling then things are not good.

After our walk Ana came into the room to check and she said that I was a very close 5cm, but she was just going to call it a 5cm and admit me. She told me that as a 3rd time mom she didn't want me leaving the hospital because I could go fast and possibly have a baby on the side of the road. So I was finally admitted into the hospital! YAY! Got the life saving Epi at about 8pm which saved me. I was so exhausted by that point and I really didn't think I had anymore in me to deal with the contractions. That did slow me down a bit, but I slowly progressed to a 6cm around 11pm and then at 11:40 or so I went from 6cm to 10cm and water breaking in less than 5 minutes. My water broke right as Ana went to see where I was at. So she ran out to call the on call doctor.

At Midnight I felt massive pressure and had to do everything not to push. Let nurse know and she started to get the room ready. At this point I was still in the admitting room because the hospital was so busy that all of their 25 other rooms were completely full and they hadn't discharged anyone yet. I was set to get the next room. I guess people have a lot of babies in the summer! Who knew as I've only ever had winter babies. About 12:20 the doctor walked in and told me that he's glad he wouldn't let me leave because he knew that I was going to have a baby quick. Here I was thinking the whole time I wasn't admitted was because of him! It wasn't him, it was that first nurse! They were joking around in the room and being pretty funny about how if the doctor is here less than 10 minutes then they don't really count him there at all. The on call doctor that delivered my baby is a good friend of my OB which mad me feel more comfortable. I really enjoy my OB because he is calm and he's more willing to let my body do it's job. The doctor that delivered Abby never gave me that chance.

He told me it was time to push. When I started he was joking with Jaron and the nurses. Someone said something funny and I started to laugh. Doctor yelled, "Keep laughing." So I tried my best and ended up pushing Ari out in one push/laugh. I became a legend at that hospital as the women who laughed her baby out. At 12:29am Aryeh Stephen Thomas Holt joined this world at 7lbs 1oz and 19 inches long! He is super cute and totally strong. Can lift his head up by himself already, but is still a little floppy about it. He totally took to breastfeeding and bottlefeeding perfectly. He is a little lazy breast feeder so we'll probably stick with bottle feeding. Either way, we are all totally in love. Especially Brooklyn who loves to call him "Baby" and thinks Ari is HER baby.

For those of you who don't know Aryeh (pronounced R-E) is hebrew for Lyon. He is named after three of Jaron's good friends who have made a difference in his life. Jaron was named after his father's two best friends and so he wants to carry on that tradition. Aryeh is for formal records like medical, birth and drivers license, but he will go by Ari for most of everything else. We are so excited to have the final member of our family here! We love to love him and snuggle him.

Monday, September 16, 2013

Rosemary chicken and red potatoes

This is a common dinner at our house. You can find it on one of those McCormick packages at the store. I make it different than what it says on the instructions.

2 T. Oil
2 tsp paprika
1 1/2 tsp rosemary
1 tsp dried minced garlic (However, I use fresh garlic)
1 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper

4-5 red potatoes cubed
1/2 chicken breast cubed

Mix everything together and bake in a 8x8 baking dish. Cover with foil if wanted and bake for about 40 minutes at 425.

8x8 baking dish feeds our family fine with leftovers. The recipe calls for your chicken to be whole, but it's easier for us to cube it and it cooks faster too.

This is a regular in our house. Enjoy!

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

9 Months Old!

I can't believe it! She has really grown so fast! Here are some of her stats.

15lbs 13oz (13%)
28 inches tall (66%)
17 inches for head (32%)

She's little, but she eats a lot! Brooklyn is now enjoying real person food in the evenings and she loves it. She loves to crawl and chase Abigal around. Her daily activities include playing with Abigal and walking along furniture. She's very active just like Abby.

This visit we discovered that Brooklyn has Labia Adhesion which causes the skin of a Labia to fuse together. Right now she's not on a cream or anything, but we will see if it happens again.

She has had a cold for about a week, but today they discovered the start of an ear infection. Unfortunately she's had too many ear infections that she hasn't had a chance to get over colds on her own yet. :(

Either way, She's a happy baby!

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

A little update

I need to update! I am so behind!
Lets start with Abby! She is as energetic as ever!! Abby loves to play with her toys and she's a great big sister. She is always willing to help me with Brooklyn and gets so excited when Brooklyn wakes up from her naps. She is starting to really talk a lot and can usually say things pretty well. The other day we were laughing with her because she said excavater like "ex-ca-va-bate-r". Too cute! Abby loves to play dress up and loves sparkly things.

Brooklyn is crawling! She crawls on her feet like a dog. She has also learned how to stand up against furniture and everyday we help her walk with a little child's stroller. She loves smiling and laughing!

Last week Brooklyn learned how to give kisses and she loves to blow raspberries on your face while she's kissing. Yesterday she called Daddy "Mumma" and he said "I'm not mommy, I'm daddy." She looked at him and said "babba" Hahah. Close enough. This little girl is starting to love daddy more and more each day.



Love having these cute girls in my life. They bring such joy!

Monday, July 1, 2013

Summer salad

Oh my goodness! This salad is so yummy. A massive thanks to my brother-in-law, Kyle for sharing! I have literally had this several times the past few weeks.



Salad:
1 bag of Spring Mix
1-2 peaches chopped
1 bunch radishes chopped, without the greens.
1 green onion chopped
1/4 cup slivered almonds

For dressing:
1/8 cup olive oil
1 Tbsp vinegar
2 tsp honey
Salt and pepper to taste
I have also used spinach and it's been amazing!