Okay, so this April I had the fortunate news to find out exactly what's wrong with me. It's IBS. It's been really bad up until I started spending time with Jaron! However, I knew it would come back to haunt me later on in life and thus it has begun to hurt again..... It's time to go on that diet again!
I feel bad about things that I have said to my family. I meant it all in a loving manner. I seriously love each and everyone of them. I'm not perfect again and I never want to seem like I am, and I don't want to preach. I'm not like that. My thoughts are thoughts in order to protect my mother. I've very protective of her. I don't know why exactly, but it kills me to have anyone say or do anything mean to her. It breaks my heart. So that's basically why I act out in the manner I sometimes to members of my family..... I do love them with all my heart.
The reason I hurt is because of stress. When my stress level increases this is when I feel the worst. So as of today, I'm feeling horrible. It's okay though, just means that what happened with things that I said was too stressful. Time to simplify my life..... I'm surely not perfect. That's the first thing I need understood. Second, I only said what I did out of kindness and love. I hope everyone understands and I am thus moving on with my life as I always have finishing school and working just as hard as ever. My choice though is to marry Jaron because he is exactly everything I need. I realize that I am young and I'm scared about the future. I worry about it daily, but I also know that both of us have a good paying job right now, and that things will be okay. I know that no matter what, Jaron will always be there for me and he will respect me and love me. He's so kind to me and so loving. This is why I am marrying him because I want that for eternity and I just love who he is. He makes me laugh when I'm the saddest and vica versa. I guess I'm just lucky enough to have found my "Soul Mate" so young in life as did some of my sisters. They are the happiest of my sisters. I just happen to be really lucky to have a man like Jaron. He's amazing.
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Hey I totally feel for you with the IBS, but the gluten-free diet helps soooo much. Yeah, the diet totally sucks, but man you feel so much better. I'll never go back, it has helped me so much! Really sucks to be casein intolerant too, which I think you mentioned you couldn't have milk products.
Anyway, if you are doing the GF and need info, let me know. I can totally hook you up with stores, recipes, good GF food, and restaurant guides even.
Anyway, love you death, and hope you don't feel too sick with all the stress. Even though you're way excited to get married, planning a wedding and stuff it stressful. Hang in there.
Love Lis :)
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